A Beautiful Mess
by jenniepennie
Summary: (Formerly Save Me, changed title because this one was more fitting!) Elena is in high school and dating the man of her dreams or so she thought she was. He leaves her heartbroken and lonely after a terrible accident. Stefan's brother Damon comes into town upon hearing the news and Elena finds herself unwillingly falling for her exes mysterious brother. AU/AH
1. Teardrops Fall

**AN: **This just something thats been on my mind for awhile and I just got the itch to write it.

**Summary:** Elena is in highschool and dating the man of her dreams or so she thought she was. A terrible accident befalls them leaving Elena feeling guilty and an emotional wreck. Stefan's brother Damon comes into town upon hearing the news and Elena finds herself unwillingly falling for her exes mysterious brother.

**Disclaimer: **Unfortunately none of these characters belong to me. They all belong to TVD the greatest show on earth! :)

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_It's so hard to lose the one you love_

_To finally have to say goodbye_

_You try to be strong but the pain keeps holdin' on_

_And all that you can do is cry_

_Deep within your heart you know it's time to move on_

_When the fairy tale that you once knew is gone_

_(When the Last Teardrop Falls ~ Blaque)_

Elena sighs heavily, slinging her backpack over her shoulder and walks out the double doors of Mystic Falls High School towards her boyfriends car. She smiles happily when she sees him leaning against the drivers door of the blue camaro. The car belonged to his brother Damon, but since he is always out of town, Stefan is the sole driver. He won't even let Elena drive the car. They got in arguments over it all the time but she always gave up and let the issue go.

She walks up to Stefan and gives him a quick peck on the cheek. "Hey baby how was practice?" Stefan was the star quarterback of the football team and Elena was co-captain of the cheerleading squad along with her best friend Caroline.

Elena was a little taken back by his cold demeanor, but shrug it aside.

"It was fine." He answered stiffly. Elena noticed a coldness in his eyes that was never there before as he looked at her. Elena nervously bit her bottom lip fumbling with her backpack.

"Is something wrong?" She asks nervously while still biting her bottom lip.

"We need to talk, get in." He opens the drivers door not even bothering to open the passenger side like he usually does. She gets in with a sigh her heart pounding in her chest. _Oh my god this is bad... I never seen his beautiful green eyes stare at me so coldy. _She plays with the straps of her backpack twisting and untwisting them the silence between them making her want to scream.

Stefan glances at her quickly noticing her nervousness. She swore she saw a flash of regret in his eyes but as quickly as it was there its gone. "I can't do this anymore Elena." He said sternly keeping his eyes on the road. "We are not good for eachother, we want different things and you know that."

"Whaa..." Elena couldn't finish tears streaming down her face. She mumbles trying to find the right words. She felt like her heart was breaking in half. "Why? What changed your mind about us? Is there someone else?"

He sighed heavily and leaned into the seat. Elena noticed that they were heading towards Wickery Bridge, oh how she hated this bridge that took her parents life from her. He glances at her seeing the sadness on her face. He never wanted to cause her pain like this but he had no choice. He was no good for _her._

"Yes... " He said hesistantly. "Katherine." He knew all he had to say was that one name for her to understand. She gasped, and felt her tears roll down her face more aggressively.

"How...what... how could you!" She screamed and smacked him across the face. "Let me out!" She screamed again kicking at the door not caring if she damages his precious car.

"Elena calm down, I can't!" He tried not to yell but Elena swiftly smacked him across his cheek and raised her hand to smack him again, that was when she noticed a SUV was swerving on the bridge heading straight towards them.

"Oh... my god! Stefan! Look out!" She yelled at him frantically a million things going through her head at once. Stefan tried to swerve but instead went straight through the railings of Wickery Bridge, heading straight down into the cold water that took her parents life. The last thing she heard was Stefan yelling her name.

"Elena!"

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AN: I know its short and yes there will be Damon which is coming next chapter. I just needed to right this out so that in future chapters everyone can understand where Elena is coming from. Please review to let me know if you want more and I am also looking for a beta if anyone is interested :)


	2. Wish it was all just a dream

Elena moaned tossing and turning on the bed sheets tangled up all around her. She slowly opened her eyes and saw bright white lights shining down on her. Is this heaven? She wondered to herself. She went to move to sit up in the bed and was suddenly pushed back down. She went to sit up again fighting whoever or whatever was trying to keep her laying down. All she wanted was to get up but the light was too bright. She noticed a throbbing pain in her head and realized she couldn't move her hands to rub her temples. More hands holding her down. She tried to speak but no words would form. If this is heaven, well it sucks, should not be painful like this. The more her eyes came into focus the more she noticed all the people around her. All of a sudden upon noticing that she was waking voices started asking her questions.

"Elena." A woman's voice spoke her name in a professional tone. "Do you remember what happened, Elena?" The person was looking at her and it was then Elena noticed that another woman was in a nurses uniform.

Not being able to form coherent thoughts Elena choked out, "Where am I? What happened? Why am I here?" She noticed hands were pushing her down again. She didn't realize she was struggling against them. A panic began to form in the pit of her stomach and she felt her heart starting to race.

"Elena, please you need to calm down honey." She recognized the voice as her aunt Jenna but couldn't seem to see her. It was then that Elena's world was met with blackness once more.

* * *

In her dream everything was perfect. She was sitting in her favorite booth at the Mystic Grille talking to Stefan, or so she thought it was Stefan. She was laughing whole heartedly at whatever joke the man was telling her. Even though part of her sub conscience knew it was a dream she couldn't remember ever being happier. This man was something else always making her smile and blush and more importantly laugh. That was something that Stefan rarely did. It was then that she noticed two concerned blue eyes staring at her. _Wow those are the most beautiful eyes I ever seen, almost like the color of the oceans you would see on tropical island brochures,_ she thought to herself. She could see herself drowning in them forever.

She woke with a start and mumbled to herself. Her dream was still vivid in her mind. She gazed around her room and noticed it was dark. She went to get up to go to the bathroom and realized she couldn't move without pulling out what was ever in her arm. What the hell was in her arm? She looked down and noticed an IV was hooked up to her a long with multiple bags that were flowing into her veins. That was when she started to remember the events that happened the night before. She started crying uncontrollably, wondering where her and Stefan went wrong.

"Oh my god Elena your finally awake!" Exclaimed a noticeably exhausted Jenna.

"Jenna?" Elena squinted in the darkness and noticed that her aunt was sitting in one of the few chairs in the room. "Oh Jenna... Jenna how is Stefan is he okay?" She nervously bit her bottom lip waiting for her response.

"Elena, Stefan is fine he's still in the hospital with a broken leg, but that doesn't matter how are you are you okay? You been out for three days." Jenna said softly, running her fingers through Elena's hair.

Elena's big brown doe eyes looked up at Jenna trying to process her words. Three days. She has been out for three days. It was then that she looked down at herself, afraid of what she was going to find. There were multiple bruises running up and down her arms. Some looked almost like handprints while others did not. Her left arm was in a swing but not in cast. Which meant it was probably only sprained. Elena felt relieved about that. As her eyes traveled down her form she gasped and looked at Jenna quickly before her brown eyes again landed on her legs. Her right leg, well rather her foot, was wrapped up tightly in a bandage and it was then that Elena started to feel pain. Real out of this world pain. Tears traveled relentlessly down her cheeks.

"Oh poor baby, Elena everything is fine you will be okay." Jenna crooned into her ear softly. Elena found it comforting that she did not wake up alone.

"Whats wrong with my foot aunt Jenna?" Elena asked softly not really wanted to hear the answer.

Jenna continued running her fingers through Elena's hair and spoke softly. "You had to have surgery since you fractured your foot in multiple places, they said you tried kicking through the window when the car went under thats what caused it. They had to do surgery to repair the damage but they said everything will be fine sweety."

Elena nodded her head. "Can I walk?" She asked.

"Yes you can you would just need to lean on you left leg for support to keep pressure of your right foot."

"Okay good cause I need to see Stefan." Elena got up with a start and almost screamed from the pain that seemed to shoot up from her foot to her head.

"Elena you can't! You need to rest." Jenna urged her to lay back down.

"No Jenna I need to do this I need to see him." She said softly with determination in her voice.

"Okay but let me help you walk there at least." Jenna said. Elena nodded and when Jenna came to the otherside of the bed she leaned on her for support. When they made it out to the long corridor Elena wrinkled her nose. How she hated the clean metallic smell of a hospital. After a few minutes they rounded a corner. Elena bumped into a hard sturdy chest and mumbled her apology to whoever it was she just bumped into. She looked up and found her brown eyes staring into two pairs of eyes that looked like an ocean.

"So blue..." She muttered and it was then that she felt herself slipping and two arms came out to catch her before she was once again met with blackness.

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**Another update yay! I am still looking for a beta if anyone is interested. :) I hope people are enjoying this story since it has been so long since I wrote any sort of fanfic. But nontheless I am excited to get back in the game. Just for now please excuse any errors and whatnot till I get a beta :) Thanks for reading and see you soon happy readers!**


	3. Hurt

**Here is a semi longer chapter for all you lovelies! Next chapter will be even longer since I got to get a lot of explanations out to get this story rolling. SO please bear with me! Okay now go ahead and read and enjoy!**

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_I hurt myself today _

_To see if I still feel _

_I focus on the pain _

_The only thing that's real _

_The needle tears a hole_

_The old familiar sting _

_Try to kill it all away _

_But I remember everything _

_What have I become _

_My sweetest friend _

_Everyone I know goes away _

_In the end _

_(Johnny Cash ~ Hurt)_

Its been three months. Well three months and two days to be exact since Elena has seen Stefan in school. She returned to school a week after her incident in the hospital and was on crutches for another two weeks. She wandered the halls alone with only her two best friends Caroline and Bonnie to accompany her. And sometimes they are not the best company since the blonde and brunette always seem to be at odds with eachother.

Elena sighed. She returned from school hours ago and retreated to her room. Sitting at her windowsill with her diary in hand she can't stop thinking about Stefan and the blue eyed stranger who seems to haunt her dreams. Why is she dreaming about this person? She doesn't even know what his face looks like! She scribbled non sense in her diary not even understanding what she said. She goes back and reads an entry that shatters her heart everytime she reads it. It was a month after the accident and she was hospitalized again because yes, her actions were foolish...

_Dear Diary,_

_Today I just got home from the hospital, yet again. Aunt Jenna and Jeremy found me on my bathroom floor in a pool of blood. Yes I did what I did when my parents died. Just when the scars on my wrist were gone here they are back again, haunting me. Why do I hurt myself so much? Nothing is ever going to save me. Nothing or no one ever will. I am lost. Sometimes I wonder why I am even on this planet... I lost my parents... I lost Stefan, my one constant that kept me going, and now... Now I have dreams of someone with the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen, and for what purpose? That I will never know I am sure of it. I can't take the pain anymore of losing people. The look on Jenna and Jeremy's face when they found me will haunt me forever. The pity and sadness mixed with disbelief. I don't know how to go on anymore I feel like a shell of myself. I am lost and always will be._

Elena closed her diary with a thud. Ever since that day Jenna and Jeremy are constantly checking on her. Elena refused to see a psychologist and put up quite the fight. She was surprised when Jenna resigned and let the issue go. More and more though she gets more agitated and annoyed that no one seems to leave her alone. Lost in thought she didn't hear that her phone was ringing until the fourth ring. Not bothering to look at the caller id Elena answered.

"Hello." Elena said seemingly annoyed to be snapped out of her self loathing.

"Lena you have to come out with us tonight I mean it I won't take no for an answer!" Caroline said with determination in her voice. Caroline and Bonnie are the only other ones that know what Elena did that night. She was grateful to have two good friends that don't spread rumors or gossip. Granted that Caroline is a major gossip queen but she is loyal and never betrayed Elena.

Elena sighed. "I don't know Care, Jenna might not let me go." It was a week before our Christmas break and Caroline had an ingenious idea to throw a party the Friday before break because she said everyone needs some fun before midterms. Sometimes Elena had trouble with her logic but Caroline was Caroline there was no changing her and her semi neurotic ways.

Elena heard Caroline huff. "Elena I spoke to Jenna she said it was fine no worries."

"You did what!" Elena yelled. Now Elena was mad she hated people going behind her back and Caroline knew that!

"Elena you need it, you need to let loose for fuck sakes all this moping around about Stefan isn't helping none. You need to realize the accident wasn't your fault." Caroline said pointedly knowing more than anyone that Elena blamed herself for the reason Stefan lost his scholarships to the state college because he will never be able to play again cause of the multiple surgeries he had on his leg.

Elena looked down at herself and groaned. She ran her fingers through her hair that felt like it was a dried up wet rat. "Care I have nothing to wear and my hair is a disaster." Elena said in hopes that her friend would give it up since the party was starting in an hour anyways. It was going to be at their usual spot in the woods where they always held bonfires for different occasions. There was always alcohol flowing as well as pot. It sounded tempting to Elena but she just didn't feel up to it.

"Nah uh, you are not giving me any of that. Be there in 10!" Caroline exclaimed happily. Before Elena could say anything Caroline hung up. Elena groaned, getting more annoyed by the minute but knowing she didn't have a choice she hopped in the shower.

* * *

Elena's eyes widened when she noticed how many people were in the woods surrounding the bonfire. Plastic cup in hand full of beer, Elena looked at her friend skeptically.

"Caroline I don't know about this." Elena said worriedly.

"Elena... really, what's the worst that can happen? This party is going to be great!" Elena had to laugh at her friend. She had to admit that Caroline's essense rubbed off on her and Elena oddly found herself in a good mood. She was surprised Caroline wasn't more pissed at her for almost slamming the door in her face when she showed up at her house.

Elena looked down at her outfit and had to ammend Caroline on a job well done. Wearing dark blue skinny jeans and a casual gray buttoned down shirt with a v-neckline and red sequined flats, Elena almost felt like her normal self... Well almost. Caroline also curled Elena's hair so that it fell down in soft waves along her back. With a little light make up and some baby pink lip gloss Elena could of walked out of a fashion magazine. Caroline looked even better with her hair in curls framing her face and her blue sequined dress and a white cardigan sweather she was ready to party. Even though Care's outfit was simple she knew how to rock it.

Elena finished her beer in one gulp and went to grab another one. Caroline took off to talk to some classmates. She asked Elena if it was okay before she did and Elena nodded to her that it was. Caroline skipped happily to her other friends no doubt catching up on the latest gossip.

Elena glances anxiously around the party to see who else was there. She found Jeremy off near the woods smoking pot. Jeremy waved back and smiled. She would express her dissapointment if it wasn't for the fact that she was a complete failure herself. Who was she to judge what other people did. She walked towards Jeremy and noticed that his eyes widened to saucers. He laughed nervously as his friends backed away.

"Elena please don't cause a scene." Jeremy said nervously.

Elena rolled her eyes and smirked. "Really Jer am I that bad? Now give me a hit I need it."

Jeremy looked shocked and a little uncertain but he knew better to say no to his sister. He handed her the joint reluctantly.

Elena smiled and took a hit like a pro. Jeremy's jaw almost dropped to the ground.

Elena laughed. "There is so little you know about your big sis Jer." She took another hit and then another, before she knew it she finished the whole damn joint. She chugged the rest of the beer that was in her cup and tossed it into the darkness of the woods.

"Oops I will be sure to buy you some tomorrow." She said nonchalantly and giggled at the looks on Jeremy's and his friends faces. Elena never felt better in her whole damn life. _Why the fuck don't I do this more often,_ She wondered to herself.

She looked through the crowds of people trying to find Caroline and before she knew it she was circled by bodies of people dancing. Deciding that she didn't have a choice she began swaying her hips to the music. God she loved this song!

_I came here tonight to get you out of my mind, _

_I'm gonna take what I find (uh oh, yeah!) _

_So open the box, don't need no key I'm unlocked And I won't tell you to stop (uh oh, yeah!)_

Elena swayed her hips mouthing the words to song while swinging her arms in the arm. It was then that she noticed someone put their hands on her hips swaying to the beat with her. She tried to turn around to see who the intruder was but thought better of it and gyrated her hips into this man. And boy was he a man she was surprised how her body seemed to mold perfectly with this stranger. She heard a chuckle in her ear that sent goosebumps across her neck.

"You really shouldn't do that." The voice said huskily into her ear.

_Hey boy!_

_I don't need to know where you've been,_

_All I need to know is you and no need for talking_

_Hey boy!_

_So don't even tell me your name,_

_All I need to know is whose place,_

_And let's get walking..._

Elena turned around then not caring that this stranger didn't seem to want her too. Without looking at him she turned around and placed her hands on his shoulders and started grinding up on him close and personal. Oh yeah he was definitely affected by her actions. Feeling drunk and high and so many wonderful things at the same time, for once in her life she didn't give a damn what people would say about her.

"If you don't stop doing that I am going to throw you over my shoulder and take you in my car. And any way I want might I add." She heard the cockiness in his voice with a mixture of something else she couldn't place.

Elena opened her eyes then and gasped. Right here in front of her was the blue eye stranger of her dreams. Well there are so many men with blue eyes so it could be anyone, but she was lost in those eyes that just stared down at her full of lust. She raised in eyebrow, her brown doe eyes penetrating into his. Not caring that her next choice of words could change everything for her she whispered seductively into his ear.

"So do it."

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**Yea bad I know. I spent a lot of time on this chapter. I know Elena is supposed to be depressed and believe me she still will be but the combination of smoking pot and drinking can change a lot of people in the moment, hehe. Thanks so much for the reviews so far they are greatly appreciated! I am surprised I even got some! Was going to write this fic with or without them cause it is simply just for my pleasure as well as all of yours too ;) If anyone has ideas where they would like to see this story going please let me know!**

**Song is Your Body by Christina Aguilera**

**And for those of you wanting to know why Elena and Stefan broke up it will all be explained soon enough. Just remember that before the accident Stefan said one name and one name only... **_**Katherine ;)**_


	4. How Many Times

**My longest chapter yet! Over 3000 words! Yay Me! lol Please review if you read even if its to say you hate it! I don't mind really :) Thanks to the ones that have reviewed so far! IF anyone hasn't noticed I am trying to develop Elena's character from an angst ridden teenager to an adult. I did not want to start her off as extremely mature and a little miss know it all. I want her character to grow as the story progresses. Okay well enjoy everyone. On with the show!**

**(Song towards the end is Hello by Evanescence listen in you tube if you can)**

**And one more thing thank you to vamomoftwins for pre reading this chapter! :-)**

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_Elena opened her eyes then and gasped. Right here in front of her was the blue eye stranger of her dreams. Well there are so many men with blue eyes so it could be anyone, but she was lost in those eyes that just stared down at her full of lust. She raised in eyebrow, her brown doe eyes penetrating into his. Not caring that her next choice of words could change everything for her she whispered seductively into his ear._

_"So do it."_

The blue eye stranger stared at her curiously. He was quite amazed that she was willing to take him up on his offer. He didn't know why he found it so surprising and not meaning to sound like a dick, it was easy for him to get laid. There was something about her however that made him feel like he couldn't take advantage of her. As she continued to gyrate against him he stifled a moan and abruptly pulled her away from him.

Her large brown doe eyes stared up at him in surprise. "What's the problem?" She asked getting annoyed that this man just wouldn't take her right then and there.

"The problem is honey I don't know your name and I am not likely to sleep with someone unless I know their name." He answered matter of factly.

"Oh get off it! What do you care what my name is? Here I am ready to go and you won't take it." She was beginning to get angry. "Of course shoulda know miss Elena is never good enough." She mumbled to herself softly so that he wouldn't hear.

Oh but he heard that comment all right and was quite amazed that this exotic creature standing before him with her red pouty lips and her hands on her hips thought of herself that way. _God what an idiot my baby bro is, _He thought to himself. Oh yeah he knew exactly who she was but wasn't ready to tell her yet since she didn't seem to have a clue who he was. He smelled the booze and pot on her breath another reason that he was not going to take advantage of her in her vulnerable state. But he found himself not wanting to leave her here either with all these horny teenage boys that stared at her with lust in their eyes.

"Actually how about I give you a ride home?" He said suddenly.

She gazed at him with uncertainity in her eyes. "Umm... my car is here actually, so I can drive myself home." She began to walk away to go back towards the party to find Caroline.

He grabbed her arm and spun her around to look at him. "You are in no way shape or form able to drive. You were just stumbling on your way back to the party, so I am taking you home." He said sternly not letting go of her arm. He was not going to take no for an answer.

She groaned loudly the annoyance evident on her face. "Seriously?" When he didn't let go of her arm she took the opportunity to stand up on her toes and whisper seductively in his ear. "So is that a way of saying when we get to my house that you are going to take me any way you want?" She smirked.

"Ugh woman! You won't give up will you? Come on lets go my car. Now!" He was frustrated and close to losing his senses and do exactly what he said he was going to do earlier.

She giggled but followed him anyways. He was still holding onto her arm when they reached his car. Her eyes widened and narrowed suspiciously when she saw he was going to the drivers door of a blue Camaro.

Suddenly she said to him, "Whats your name by the way?" She asked with an edge to her voice.

He looked at her and she swore she saw a flash of uncertaintly pass through his eyes. It was gone as soon as it was there. He smirked and said simply, "Why my dear my name is Damon."

She gasped and backed away from him stumbling, "Is this some sick joke? If Stefan is playing a game with me you can tell him to go fuck himself! Or better yet go fuck that whore of his!" She didn't realize she was screaming till she saw a crowd start to form around them.

Damon stared at her with a bewildered expression on his face. _Damn Stefan really did a number on her, _He thought to himself. Before he could speak she ran up to him and poked him in his chest. If it wasn't for the seriousness of the situation he would of laughed but he continued to gaze at her with a sober expression.

"How is it possible this car is even here? " She had to ask cause yeah though she was beyond pissed off at herself for shamelessly flirting with Stefan's older brother, she was curious.

"Huh," He seemed stumped. "The car wasn't really that damaged except for someone who was in the passenger seat that tried to kick the window opened. But when they retrieved it from the waters I made sure that she got all fixed up. After all this car is my baby and us Salvatores can afford it."

Elena rolled her eyes. Typical Salvatore men flaunting there wealth like it meant nothing to them. "Okay all I needed to know. I also take it I don't have to tell you my name since you already know who I am." With that she spun on her heels and walked away.

"Wait!" Damon jogged up to her. When he realized she wasn't going to stop walking he walked backwards so that he could face her. He couldn't quite understand what kept pulling him to this woman but he couldn't stop himself. "Just so you know Stefan didn't know I was going to be here. Hell I didn't even know you were going to be here."

She rolled her eyes again obviously not believing him. He noticed her eyes were glassy with unshed tears. "You know what just stay away from me... please." She croaked out.

With that she saw Caroline and waved to her friend running to leave the intense gaze Damon was giving her.

* * *

It's been a week since everyone was back from Christmas break. Elena sighed with relief as she was walking towards her car. Today was the first day since the party that she hasn't seen Damon. Well since he was giving Stefan rides to school everyday now she suffered watching him watch her everyday she left school. Then again Stefan wasn't in school today so that was probably why. She was annoyed with his brother who just didn't seem to get the point. No matter how many times she told him that she wanted nothing to do with him he would make an attempt to say hi or sometimes say nothing at all. She really wanted all Salvatore's out of her life for good.

When she got home she sat in front of her bay window with her diary in hand. She began to scribble furiously.

_Dear Diary,_

_It's been awhile. Remember way back when I mentioned Katherine? No wait you wouldn't remember that since I never wrote about it to begin with. When me and Stefan started dating he told me this story of two brothers who fought over the same girl. When I put two and two together I asked if it was him and his brother. He reluctantly said yes and I remember my mind reeling over this fact. I mean me and Stefan are now both currently 18 and Damon is 22. Why would Damon be interested in someone that young? When I asked Stefan this he told me he was 16 when he met Katherine who was then 18. Okay so that made more sense to me. What I wasn't prepared for was him telling me how she was a manipulative little you know what who played both him and his brother to no end. They fought and sometimes those fights literally came to blows. Eventually they both tossed the bitch aside and that is all I know. But apparently I was wrong because Stefan obviously did not 'toss' that bitch aside. I mean that's why he broke up with me for fuck sakes! For that whore! And now his brother Damon seems interested in getting to know me. Seriously? What the hell is wrong with these Salvatore men! I am NOT Katherine. Damon will find that out soon enough especially if he keeps trying to talk to me. And another thing I don't need or want anyone in my life! I am perfectly fine with being alone. I don't need anymore heartache or heartbreak and more importantly... I can't live another day if I lose someone that I love again..._

Elena closed her diary and noticed that it was beginning to get dark. She took a quick shower, toweled dried her hair, grabbed her favorite teddy bear and crawled under her covers. Tears rolled freely down her face as she cried herself to sleep.

* * *

The days and weeks seemed to slowly drift by. Before she knew it, it was almost time for the spring dance. Yeah the one that Saint Stefan was suppose to bring her too. So much for those plans. She made sure she always kept her mind occupied with thoughts that were not _him._ Why she couldn't shake him she was unsure. She hasn't seen him in awhile and was grateful that he seemed to have given up. Part of her was dissapointed but she pushed that aside. She mainly focused on her school work and chatted here and there with Caroline and Bonnie but on the whole she pretty much stayed away from everyone.

"You know Elena you can't do this to yourself anymore." A concerned Bonnie said snapping her out of her thoughts.

Elena sighed and looked ignored Bonnie's eyes. She couldn't stand how people seemed to pity her and if they even looked at her with remotely any understanding she wanted to vomit. "Bonnie I am fine." She said with false conviction.

"No your not. I know what you need. Go to this dance Elena, I will be your date." Bonnie smiled softly and winked at her with a twinkle in her eyes.

"No no no. No!" Elena exclaimed. What is wrong with people thinking that stupid dances and even more stupid parties and stupid dances that are held at the Lockwood manor or going to fix anything is beyond her.

"Oh come on Lena! It will be fun!" Said an overly exhuberant Caroline who then plopped herself in the booth beside Elena leaving her with no form of escape.

They were sitting at their favorite booth in the Mystic Grille where they met every Friday after School.

"I set up a theme for the spring dance," Caroline exclaimed excitedly. She was also the one that was in charge of all the school events. Was no surprise there because Caroline was known for throwing the past dances/parties in town. "I wanted to throw a masquerade ball! You know like the ones that royal courts would do in the 17th and 18th century." Caroline smiled with glee.

"Really Care where would we get such elaborate costumes?" Elena asked her curiosity was peeked at the mention of a masquerade ball. She felt this was the perfect opportunity to be whoever she wanted to be and no one would know who she was cause of the mask!

"Really Lena you think I want to be wearing some ball length gown that poofs a mile out and thats heavy as hell to this dance?" Caroline said exasperately. "I am going for more of a modern look."

Elena sighed with relief. "Okay sounds great."

Bonnie looked at her skeptically. "You sure Elena? Just a minute ago you were dead set against this idea."

"Well," Elena smiled happily. "I just realized that its time to have some fun. And whats more fun than a masquerade ball?" Bonnie continued to look at her unsure whether to believe her or not but nodded anyways.

Elena inwardly sighed with relief. Caroline seemed happy that Elena was up for it and started rambling about ideas for dresses and masks for the ball. Elena's thoughts drifted and began picturing herself in a ball gown that was preferably black with an elegant mask dancing with a certain blue eyed someone. In her fantasy everything was perfect. They both had perfect lives with a wonderful evening that lied ahead of them full of passion and sweaty naked bodies clinging to eachother as if they were eachothers lifeline. She snapped out of her thoughts and shook her head silently. Life wasn't like that unfortunately. Life was hard and cruel and caused people pain and misery. No good could come of this life. She tried to clear her thoughts and placed her attention back to Bonnie and Caroline who were now animately arguing about color schemes or something like that.

* * *

That monday at school when classes were done Elena wandered into the music room. Her fingers itching to play the piano. It was not something she did very often anymore but since the only ones left in her school were the football players currently at practice, she sat down at the piano, knowing the jocks never showed up here. Since her parents passed she never played any form of music again since her mother was the one that taught her how to play the piano. Every so often however she came to this music room and poured her heart and soul out. Sometimes it was a relief as it was an outlet she did not use much.

Elena stroked her fingers against the keys and started playing a simple melody. When she found the right rhythm she began to sing pouring all her emotions into this one song.

_Playground school bell rings again_

_Rain clouds come to play again_

_Has no one told you she's not breathing?_

_Hello, I am your mind giving you someone to talk to_

_Hello_

_If I smile and don't believe_

_Soon I know I'll wake from this dream_

_Don't try to fix me I'm not broken_

_Hello I am the light living for you so you can't hide_

_Don't cry_

Tears streamed down her face. Fingers still tenderly stroking the keys of the piano, Elena continued lost in her world.

* * *

Outside the doorway standing in the corridor was Damon. He was absolutely stunned that this beautiful woman was so talented. Why she hid it he had no clue. He watched as she lovingly caressed the piano keys and listened to her sing. The pain and anguish he heard in her voice tugged at his heart. He never knew someone could have so much pain. He honestly never even considered that someone else in this world had as much pain as he did. He continued to listen to her knowing she wouldn't notice she had an audience because her eyes were tightly shut. He noticed that tears were rapidly streaming down her face. The temptation to go and kiss them away softly was too much. Unshed tears welled up in his eyes as she finished the song.

_Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping_

_Hello, I'm still here_

_All that's left of yesterday_

The girl had a powerful voice no doubt. Not wanting to freak her out he walked down the hallway to go grab Stefan who watched his classmates practice after school everyday. Still with images of this beautiful innocent, heartbroken girl in his mind, Damon came to the conclusion that there was no way in hell he was going to leave her alone.

* * *

Elena sighed softly, swiftly wiping the tears from her eyes. How she loved that song with a passion. She missed singing and playing the piano, she truly did. At the same time though she felt it was something she didn't deserve. She gets in a car accident with her parent's, they both die. She gets in an accident with Stefan, he can't play football anymore. She ruined everyone's lives just by being here.

She groaned remembering that she had an ounce of weed in her backpack. Maybe that will do the trick always mellowed her out and made her happy, well somewhat anyways. Turning around making sure no one was coming she put some in a baggy for her and the rest she left in the remaining bag being sure to give it to Jeremy tonight when he got home. If he got home. Part of her was concerned from him but it didn't matter there was nothing she could do about it. He was better off without her.

Closing the piano cover and slinging her backpack over her shoulder she headed out towards the parking lot. Her eyes widened when she saw the all too familiar blue camaro and sighed with relief that it was empty and that no blue eyed sexy god was around. Fumbling for her keys in her backpack she heard someone come up behind her calling her name.

"What?" She snapped not caring who it was.

"Boy someone is_ grouchy_." An all too familiar voice said. She turned around and found Damon smirking at her.

"Seriously Damon, don't you have anything better to do than stalk a bunch of high school students?" She asked silently cursing herself as her eyes roamed down his solid form.

"Well..." He drawled smirking when he noticed how she was oggling him. "Technically there is only one that I stalk. If I remember correctly she wanted me to take her anyway I wanted." He added in a husky voice.

"Humph well that was a delirious moment." She said with conviction in her voice. She opened her drivers door and sat in the seat.

Damon laughed at her expression. "Keep telling yourself that, by the way you have a beautiful voice."

Caught off guard Elena looked up at him absolutely stunned with red cheeks. "You were spying on me?" the anger evident in her voice.

Damon sensing the anger that was swirling in her petite form said quietly, "Not spying per se was just walking by and then I happened too see you." He shrugged his shoulders like it was nothing. Too his surprise she got out of the car and slapped him across his face.

Damn that girl packs a punch! He stared down at her with disbelief. "If I ever and I mean ever see you again, you stay far away! I mean it Damon Salvatore!" With that she slammed her car door shut and sped away, tires squealing on the asphalt, leaving a stunned Damon staring after her.

* * *

**At first I was going to delete this fic but now I love it. Definitely a great outlet for me. Plz review! I normally don't like asking for them but since I am planning on making this a LONG multi chapter fic between 25-30 chapters I want to know if it would be worth doing a story that long :) Thanks again for reading! I think I am going to stop posting everyday too, I am thinking about maybe 3 times a week so it will give me an opportunity to write longer chapters :) So next chapter will probably be up by mid to end of this week.**


	5. Masquerade Part 1

**A/N: Yay new chapter! Big Thank you too kayagirl99 (Jessica) for beta-ing this for me! =D Okay on with the show and enjoy. Please remember to review! **

* * *

It's the day of the masquerade ball or spring dance. Might as well not even be a spring dance since practically the whole town was going to be at the Lockwood manor later that night. Caroline was going with Tyler Lockwood, which was surprising since the two always seemed to hate each other. _ Guess they must have bonded or something over planning for the ball_, Elena thought. She was barely listening to her history teacher lecture the class on the Civil War. Mr. Saltzman or _Alaric, _as he liked to be called, was one of the coolest teachers at Mystic Falls High school. Plus her Aunt Jenna had an insane school girl crush on him. Elena wondered if he felt the same way towards her aunt. They were both going to be to the ball tonight, and Elena already saw Jenna's dress and mask and instantly she knew her aunt was going to sweep her history teacher right off his feet. The bell rang, shaking her out of her reverie. Just as she was about to leave the classroom, Alaric stopped her at the door.

"Elena if you have a moment I'd like to speak to you." He gazed at her, softly.

"Sure Mr. Saltz-I mean Alaric, what's up?" She was never asked to speak to him directly after class so she was curious.

"I - umm - How do I," he stuttered blushing, "What I mean is, is Jenna going to be at the ball tonight?" he blurted out.

Elena laughed as she noticed his blush creeping down to his neck. "Ew, you're my teacher and you like my aunt don't you." she smirked, knowingly.

"Well I know this is highly inappropriate for me to be asking this since you are my student and all, but I am not going to lie to you Elena, I like your aunt." he blushed more deeply and if he got any redder Elena was afraid he was going to explode.

"Oh, it's okay trust me, the feeling is mutual." his eyes perked up with excitement at that. "But... I am not telling you what she's wearing or what kind of mask she's in; I am going to leave it up to you to figure that one out." Elena winked at him and walked out of the classroom leaving her tomato red teacher flustered.

Ah, sometimes it was times like this where she felt like a teenager again. She walked to her car and, traveled home knowing she would have to start getting ready as soon as possible. Caroline and Bonnie were going to meet her at her house in about an hour which gave her plenty of time to relax and enjoy a little something hidden in her bedroom. She sighed with relief that Jenna wasn't home yet and Jeremy was God knows where. She walked up to her room locking the door behind her. She went to her windowsill, sat down, opened a window, and took the neatly rolled joint out of her purse. After taking her first hit and blowing the smoke out the window she visibly relaxed. She stared at the little white joint wanting to kiss it. Thank god there is something in this world that can calm her nerves and make her feel like the giddy teenager that's locked away inside her. There is only one problem when she smokes this... she gets let's just say, turned on for some unknown reason. Sighing she took two more hits put it out and wrapped the rest up and put it in the little clutch she was going to bring to the ball with her.

* * *

Two hours later Bonnie, Caroline, and Elena stood in front of her mirror in the bathroom finishing touches on their makeup. They stood around admiring each other and Elena thought they all looked like princesses going to the ball too meet there Prince Charmings'. If only that was true, Elena groaned inwardly. Looking back at her reflection she had to once again commend her crazy semi neurotic friend on a job well done.

Even though they both strongly disapproved of Elena's dress at first they gasped when they saw her as she spun around and showed them her completed look. She was dressed in a silky black ruffle asymmetrical floor length gown. It had a ruffled stitched salsa style hemline that showed off her shapely legs, with its plunging neckline and her bare back her olive skin glowed in this dress. To finish it off was her five inch rhinestone studded sandal like heels and her Venetian style black mask with crystals on the eyes, Elena looked like a completely different person. She didn't feel like a teenager anymore, hell she didn't even feel like her and that was the whole point! Why they argued about this dress was beyond her. Yes, it was showy but in a flattering non slutty way.

"Oh my God, Elena, and to think we argued and said this dress was too daring!" Caroline exclaimed, looking at her friend with admiration in her eyes.

"Yea, 'Lena wish I could have pulled that off," Bonnie smile softly.

"Oh, guys you look great, too!" Elena said, happy that they finally approved of the dress.

"Pfft, Elena look at us, while you don't even look like you're in high school anymore, when everyone looks at us they will have no trouble knowing who we are, whereas, you are a completely different story. No one would ever think Elena would wear something like this." Caroline whined loudly tugging at her ball length gown dress. She was wearing a navy blue satin dress with a slit on the side showing of her long legs, her mask was peacock inspired and the whole outfit was totally Caroline. Then there was Bonnie who didn't like dressing up much. Even though she was in a simple knee length black silk dress with long sleeves, it hugged her curves in all the right places. Her simple black mask and her hair in curls, Elena thought she wouldn't have known this was Bonnie at first glance.

"Care, you are silly. Both you and Bonnie are stunning!" Elena spoke, happily.

Caroline looked at herself again in the mirror and giggled. She jumped up and down and grabbed Elena and Bonnie into a group hug. "I'm sorry, you're right we are going to be the hottest bitches at the dance/ball whatever you want to call it!" Caroline smiled her excitement rubbing off on Elena.

Caroline squealed making Elena want to cover her ears. "Oh my God, Jenna, you're hot!"

It was then that Elena noticed her aunt Jenna standing in the doorway nervously. She was wearing an off white strapless gown with a diamond studded corset like top and it flowed down from her hips showing off her shapely figure. To finish off her look was her white feathered mask that was silver studded around the eyes.

Jenna blushed furiously as the girls fawned over her. "'Lena, my goodness I wouldn't know that was you if you didn't live here!"

It was Elena's turn to blush. This is what she wanted, though; to forget about her life for a night and live as someone else. She wondered how many people were going to be there. The thought was making her nervous and she fidgeted uncomfortably in her dress. Why did she pick this again? Oh, right, because she wanted to do something she normally wouldn't do. The doorbell rang making her forget her thoughts. The girls rushed around grabbing what they needed. Elena grabbed her simple black clutch and headed down the stairs into the limo Caroline rented to take them to the ball. Knowing Caroline, she wanted to make sure they made quite an entrance.

* * *

Elena nervously fidgeted with her hair that was cascading around her shoulder in soft curls. They were fast approaching the Lockwood manor. She gasped when they pulled to a stop and exited the limo.

"Caroline, it's beautiful," she said in admiration.

Caroline blushed and giggled, happily. She did indeed do a wonderful job. Instead of being inside the manor, Caroline wanted to do an outdoor ballroom. People would still be able to access the house for food and drinks and whatnot, but the makeshift ballroom outside was beautiful. There was what must have been a half a football field wide of a stage with a band playing soft music. The dance floor was off white and sparkling. Overhead was an off white canopy that went across the whole dance floor. There were beautiful white lights shining down casting a glow and that made the atmosphere extremely romantic and mysterious. Even better now that it was spring and it wasn't too hot or cold; everything was perfect.

Caroline was mumbling something and didn't seem too happy when a figure approached her.

"Caroline?" the voice asked. Elena had no clue who it was due to the mask.

"Yes?" Caroline squeaked.

"Oh, thank God, I was wondering when you were going to show, you want to look around?" The man asked again. Elena only assumed it must of been Tyler, what she didn't understand is why Caroline did not seem happy about it. He was her date after all.

"Fine," Caroline huffed and nodded apologetically to the remaining females. They watched Caroline and Tyler take off into the house.

"What was that about?" Bonnie asked echoing Elena's thoughts exactly.

"I have no clue," Elena answered, honestly.

Jenna suddenly clapped her hands together excitedly. "Well, I, for one, am ready to mingle and party!" They watched Jenna retreat into the house.

"Well, ' Lena ready to go mingle ourselves as well?" Bonnie asked holding her arm out for Elena to take.

Elena smile and hooked her arm through her best friend, "Let's get this party started."

* * *

After an hour of checking out the inside of the mansion and mingling outside with their fellow classmates, Bonnie and Elena were sitting at one of the multiple benches that were set up by the dance floor.

"Well, getting dressed up was fun, but I am bored as hell," muttered Bonnie.

Elena nodded in agreement and fidgeted with her mask, "Bonnie you can leave if you want, though. I know you were never one for this type of thing."

Bonnie glanced at her friend unsure whether or not she should leave her alone, because sometimes leaving Elena alone causes her to do crazy things, "I don't know, Elena, I don't want to leave you here all by yourself."

Elena scoffed, "Really, Bon? I will be fine. Jenna and Caroline are still here." She pointed towards the dance floor where Jenna was dancing with someone who had sandy blonde hair. She could only assume that it was Alaric and that he found her aunt. Elena smiled at that. Then there was Caroline who seemed like she was fuming at a very gropey Tyler.

Bonnie and Elena hugged saying their goodbyes. After Bonnie left, Elena was all alone sitting at the bench. She sighed and picked up her clutch. _I need to find a place to smoke this, _she thought to herself. As she stood up she hit a solid chest that caused her to wobble a hand came out and grabbed her to steady her. She looked at the man's shoes, his fitted black slacks with subtle stripes running along his pant legs, his crisp white shirt, and then the black fitted tuxedo jacket to his face. He was wearing a mask so she had no clue who he was. It was a simple black mask his raven locks falling into his eyes. Wait... those eyes... those piercing blue eyes. _Seriously Elena get a grip on yourself. Just because he has blue eyes doesn't mean it's Damon._

"Would you like to dance?" the man suddenly said, smirking at the petite girl standing in front of him.

"Umm, I got to, Yea- " Elena rushed off into the house leaving a very confused person staring after her.

* * *

Elena wandered around the Lockwood's mansion for a good twenty minutes before she found the study. She walked in shutting the door behind her. A little desk lamp was on casting a glow around the room. Since no one was coming this way, she knew she was going to be disturbed. Everyone was too busy drinking or dancing to care about looking at the rooms in the mansion. She took her trusty little friend out of her clutch and lit it up. After taking her first hit she gazed around the room. It was huge for a study! There was a big solid mahogany desk with enormous bay windows behind it which looked out to the yard. She could see the party still going even though it was getting close to midnight. This was definitely going to be an all-night affair.

She walked over the bookshelf running her fingers along the spines of the books. There were so many collector editions. Lost in the books, she stiffened when she thought she heard a creak of wood like someone else was in the room with her. When she didn't hear it anymore she sighed with relief and took another hit of her trusty friend. Then she started thinking about the man that asked her to dance. She knew it was Damon, only so many people had that voice that could make you melt into a pile of goo in front of him. That's why she ran in the house so quickly she really didn't want anything to do with him. But he didn't know who she was, did he? She did look different so maybe he had no clue. She had a lot of older sophisticated men come up to her tonight asking to dance.

Finishing her joint, still lost in thought she spun around to try to find a place to throw the rest away.

"Oh my God!" she yelled when she turned around and found herself inches away from the man in front of her. "Really? Don't people bother to knock anymore?" she muttered, angry that she was caught smoking pot.

The man chuckled, which caused Elena's eyes to snap to his, "Well," he drawled out "No one needs to knock when it's technically not your house."

"Shit D-Damnit don't tell anyone I was here please," she winked at him and was about to say his name but thought better of it. Besides wasn't this what she wanted? People to not know who she was tonight. That was the whole point of the mask and why she never took it off.

* * *

Damon was amused at the petite brunette standing before him. At first he didn't know who she was but there was no mistaking those brown doe eyes that he has come to known. Confirming with Caroline that this was indeed Elena he was shocked to say the least. She was gorgeous! Dressed in a tantalizing dress her brown locks flowing around her shoulders and her olive skin glowing in the light of the room, he looked her up and down appreciatively. No, wonder she was getting looks to kill tonight from random males. He noticed her blush at his intense gaze and decided he could play along with this game. After all she didn't seem like she was ready to take that mask off and reveal herself to him.

* * *

Elena blushed as Damon continued to gaze intently at her a thoughtful expression on his face. Since he hasn't said her name or made some witty remark she assumed he had no idea who she was.

"Well, I'm done here the study is all yours," she muttered walking towards the door.

"Wait!" he grabbed her by the elbow and spun her around. They were so close almost too close for comfort. Elena's breasts were heaving up and down so close to his chest. She stared into his eyes and then her gaze traveled to his chiseled jaw line and then his lips. _God those full lips just begging to be kissed._

"I was wondering if you would like to dance with me?" he asked amusingly. He noticed how her eyes landed on his lips; he could see her brown eyes darken.

She looked back into his piercing blue eyes and smiled hesitantly, "Sure, I guess we can, want to head back out to dance?"

He whispered softly in her ear causing a shiver to go down her spine, "I rather dance here if you don't mind."

Elena nodded and if possible he pulled her closer to him. She shivered involuntarily when his right hand wrapped around her waist, his thumb flicking along the exposed skin of her lower back. With his other hand he grasped her fingers and they began slow dancing. Elena was afraid he was going to hear her heart pounding frantically. God, what was she doing? The buzz of smoking weed and a few drinks here and there she wasn't thinking clearly. But she knew she wasn't drunk she was far from it. The only question was why couldn't she leave?

She was afraid to look at him, afraid of what was going to happen if she did. As if her head had a mind of its own she gazed up at him her eyes capturing his. Her heart almost stopped right then and there. His once bright blue eyes were darkened with lust. She licked her lips nervously and he surprised her with a moan. Damn that moan made her inner thighs tingle with something she hasn't felt in a long time. They were so lost in their own world and failed to notice that the music that drifted into the study was soon ending.

Not thinking twice Elena wrapped her tiny hands around his neck and pulled him to her aggressively and kissed him. She ran her tongue along his lower lip begging for entrance. He growled and slid his tongue against hers. Elena moaned loudly into his mouth causing him to grip her even more tightly. His hands ran along her thighs where the exposed skin was. He backed her into the desk where she gladly sat on the edge off never breaking contact with his lips. She wrapped her legs around his waist and brought him closer to her. She felt his hard on pressing against her core, she wanted more! Not caring who he was her hands traveled up his clothed chest and tugged his jacket off him. Rubbing herself against his erection she thought she was going to explode if she didn't have him inside her soon.

They were so far gone into each other they failed to notice that someone opened the door and was now standing there watching them.

"What the hell?" a voice said, unexpectedly.

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**Review please! =D**


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